Who Am I?

You know, for the most part I have tried to live as authentic a life as possible. With the exception of love, I have lived by my will and rules. Who am I then? I still do not know exactly what it is I am meant to do on this Earth. I only pray everyday for guidance. As Steve Job said in that now famous commencement address to Stanford, "You will know it when You find it." Like love. I have begun to really examine myself after a lifetime of examining other people. I have been delving into myself, taking note when things peak my interest and what horrifies or excites me. Who am I? It is time for a rebirth. I have actually for the first time thought about getting a tattoo. A tattoo of a Phoenix, who was born and died in a blaze of fire. I feel a burn coming on. t2ul8r!

The Second Season of My Life

Dear Universe,
Candy, my coworker of over 8 years retired recently. She turns 62 on June 16, 2011 and will be moving to Vina del Mar, Chile, by the beach into a big house. I took over her position as data processor for the company. Though the position is a step up and away from being chained to the phone, it is not Human Resources, the field I want to get into. I took it for the pay and for the break from the phone. I took her leaving hard, harder than I expected. I actually cried when she left. Her leaving was a reminder of many endings in my life in recent years, the end of my first season of life. Once single , I am now married, once a renter, now I own, once childless, I have a child, and now a new job. I cried because I will miss her and I cried because, I couldn't believe it had been 8 years already at the same company. I want to retire abroad as she did, but not from this company. If I changed so much in five years, I will change even more in the next five. We will open our first business in five, and be real estate moguls in ten. I was very depressed until I got a goal, and that is my goal, to be in business for myself. With God's help I will. Till next time.
-Hialeah Girl

Now What?

I feel hopeless. Utterly alone and smiling to lift myself from the coming depression. Is it my period or is it just a feeling of stagnation garnered from days of inescapable duties and automation? My alone lights are my son and husband. They should encompass my whole world no? Then why do I sense a gnawing feeling of incompleteness eating away at me? I am capable of so much, yet I am stuck in mediocrity at work roaming aimlessly for my true life's purpose. Where do I go from here? Now what?

I did it baby! We got the house!!!

To all my beautiful readers whom i have neglected with updates of my life, my husband and I were able to purchase a home. We are ecstatic to say the least. It is a small cozy home on a double corner lot in Hialeah. It boasts a renovated kitchen and bathroom (one!)We were able to get an above ground pool and a patio that is half concrete. It's home period. Over time, my hubby and I will get it just right. We are praying for a joyful holiday season in our house. There is plenty of room for everyone. Time to get to work on it! Thanks for reading.

The Natives Are Restless

It's been six months since I began the oddessy of buying a home after the real estate apocalypse that happened. Six long months of running to stand still. I have put so many things on hold until after we buy that I personally do not care anymore. No more "no" only "yes" to any incredible opportunity that presents itself. "YES!" IS THE ANSWER TO LIFE. No more conditions, just action. Yes!!!!!!!!!! That is all for today.

Premonitions

For some reason i have become obsessed with the date September 9, 2010. Something wonderful is going to happen that day, something big. I put down on my kitchen calander that that was "The Day." I cannot tell you exactly what that will be, what kind of day, only that that day will change my life forever. I have decided to write down all these weird feelings I get into a journel of premonitions. Today, for instance, I became extremely depressed and agitated. I had no reson to be, but I was. Was I just vibing off of people or did I have an unresolved issue torturing my subconscious, or was I just PMSing? Whatever it was, it sucked and I worked hard to change my mood.
I have been struggling for some time now on what course of action to take with my profesional life. Right now, i will be pursuing a degree in HR and finishing my book ideas. Ideally, I'd make money off of my books and live on easy street like that. What do you think? Holla. :P


Update: The day of September 9, 2010 was the day I OFFICIALLY GOT THE GREEN LIGHT ON MY MORTGAGE FOR MY CURRENT HOME. It was a go after that. We closed on the house on September 22, 2010. One of my best days EVER.

New Moon Blues

Just call me a Catholic witch. I pray the rosary as much as I can, pray everyday at least one Hail Mary and an Our Father. Try to be a better person than I was yesterday and look to a brighter future. There are two times a month though that I feel out of whack, the new moon and the full moon.
Ask any cop and they"ll tell you they get the craziest calls on the full moon. They brace for it. I get all the extra magnetic pool makes us all a little crazy. The full moon makes me think of love, old and new. It makes me nostalgic.
The new moon just depresses me. I get super emotional and doubtful about everything. I feel like crying now and it won't be here for another three days! WTF!
Anyway, I had to vent.
Goodnight Hialeah.